More Men Than You'd Think Want to Find Love on Vacation

Falling in love on vacation is a legit thing—at least, a good portion of men hope it is.
That's the major finding from a new survey of 1,158 millennials from Topdeck Travel and YouGov, that discovered that one in eight men hope to find love while they're on vacation. (Worth pointing out: Just one in 20 women expect to do the same.)The findings flip the notion that men just want vacation flings on its head—apparently we're less likely to think a vacation romance has staying power than they do. The survey also found that travel is a priority for millennials. More than 40 percent of women and 32 percent of men are willing to give up dating to save money for trips—which could be because the two actually go hand in hand. "From social media to online dating, millennials are stepping away from impersonal messaging apps to find love and are instead looking to connect with people in an authentic, unique way," Sarah Clark, global brand director for Topdeck Travel, said in a press release.At the same time, dating apps and social media can also make it easier to meet people in a variety of locations. As technology makes it less of a challenge to communicate with others far away, long-distance relationships are becoming more common, and research has shown that couples with these arrangements are actually closer than those who live in the same place.

"My Boyfriend's Female Roommate Walks Around Topless"

The #FreeTheNipple movement has made it more acceptable for women to be topless in front of others. And for the most part, that's not a problem. But throwitaway25705's boyfriend's female roommate is freeing the nipple all over their apartment, and it's making her jealous. Should she be?
"She has done it before but has done it more since he got with me," she writes. "Finally, I asked him why he is still with me if he could obviously have her. He tried to console me by having sex with me, but ignored my breasts. He earlier claimed that he didn't want to tell her what to do in her own home and that he doesn't want her."She also mentioned that she feels insecure because this woman has bigger breasts than her—which the roommate brought up when she tried to confront her about being topless, saying she can't help it that she's more well-endowed.Is it fair of her to ask her boyfriend or his roommate to do anything about this? Or would that be infringing on her right to dress (or not dress) how she wants? Here's what Reddit has to say:"I'm very casual about nudity but I realize that a lot of people aren't. Generally, I modify my behavior to avoid discomforting others. This girl is either a crazy militant about the whole 'free the nipple' thing, or she's got other ambitions." —backseat_adventurer"It sounds like your boyfriend is not a boob man, or at least not a big boob man. Lots of guys like smaller breasts. You should tell him to give your breasts more attention in bed—he might have been avoiding them so as to not set you off. His roommate is terrible and if he's as great as he seems, he will find a new place to live ASAP and NEVER let her answer the door/be alone with you." —bravepig"She has a right to walk around her house topless, and I [and] many of my friends with roommates do. But her comment to you was so rude and mean. Why didn't he stand up for you?! Does this guy have a spine at all?" —panic_bread"Call me conservative, but I find the roommate's behavior very odd and [it] would make me uncomfortable (I'm a girl). Her and your BF are sharing an apartment, so no she doesn't get to do 'anything she wants' because it's 'her apartment.' If an action or behavior of hers becomes disruptive to your BF, then he has a right to tell her to stop. ... Your BF is not standing up for you or being 100 percent honest with you. Chances are he enjoys seeing her topless and so is coming up with excuses why he hasn't said anything. To me this is completely unacceptable." —sour_lemons"Am I the only one who thinks being topless in a male-female roommate situation is weird? Like...if I lived with a man platonically I wouldn't just walk around topless. To me, its abnormal that she does this." —booboo417"I'm also a female who believes in 'free the nipple' and I have male roommates who have girlfriends, but I would never sit around my apartment topless, out of respect for their relationships." —laurenrm

"Why Visiting a Love Psychic Completely Changed My Outlook on Dating"

"If you could find out when you were going to die, would you want to know?" is a question sometimes asked to spark philosophical discussions. I always say I would, since that knowledge would inspire me to live the years before that date to the fullest and quell worries that I might die sooner.
Well, a psychic recently told me when I'd meet my soulmate, and strangely, it had a similar effect. I now feel zero pressure to make anything work within the three-year time frame she gave me.

Let me back that up for a second. The psychic I spoke with was Deborah Graham, star of TLC's and Discovery's The Psychic Matchmaker. She's been having premonitions since she was six and advising clients on their love lives for over 20 years. Over the phone, she explained to me that she can read people's energy in order to determine what their strengths and challenges are in relationships, what their future love lives look like, and even whether two people are compatible.I was a bit skeptical about speaking with a psychic, but any skepticism I had going in eroded throughout the session, as she described my personality and relationship history to a T."You are so well organized. You're great at your work," she told me, "but when it comes to love, you're going to suck because that's when you've got blinders on." She also picked up on the fact that I'd never had a truly healthy relationship. "You have a loser magnet on your forehead, so the guys that are not healthy find you." Yup, this woman tells it like it is. And she was completely spot-on.But then came the most interesting part. I would meet someone who would "overachieve every expectation"...in three years.At first, I was crushed. I'd been single for the past two-and-a-half years already and was hoping to see the light at the end of the tunnel soon. Now I had to wait three more years?What she said next, though, made me realize this wasn't disappointing news at all. She explained that over the next three years, I'd date "fillers"—people who come into your life before you meet the one you'll ultimately end up with in order to teach you about yourself and prepare you for that final relationship. I should enjoy exploring these relationships now, she said, because after three years, I will never explore another relationship again. In short, all I have to do for the next three years is have fun.I really liked the prospect of having three years just to screw around, and that surprised me. I normally take dating really seriously. I vet people based on strict criteria, like whether or not they want kids and where they see themselves living. I take things slow physically because I want them to last, and I turn down casual hookups to make room for something longer-lasting. I didn't realize how exhausting that has been until I was faced with the notion that I might not have to stress about it.I suppose I'd been on such a frantic search for a soul mate because I didn't realize I had time to find one. But now that I've been told I can take my time, I'm excited to let loose a bit, to have more casual relationships, and to date anybody I want, whether they share my long-term goals or not. I'm also thankful for the chance to continue prioritizing my career over romance, which Graham mentioned many women don't do enough.It might seem naive to base these decisions on a psychic, but they can be justified from a logical perspective as well. I don't need a psychic to tell me that I'll probably meet someone who is compatible with me long-term one day, and that when this day arrives is largely out of my control. I also don't need permission to have fun in the meantime. In fact, a friend of mine has a similar attitude based purely on a calculation: In order to have kids while she's still of childbearing age, she needs to meet a life partner within five years, so she has decided to spend five years just having fun.Whether or not fate has allotted me three years, I've decided to allot them to myself. For at least three years, I'm going to focus on what will make me happy now, not who I could see myself marrying one day. I'm going to enjoy traveling and having adventures, and meeting many different people, all while continuing to put my career before anybody. And if I end up meeting my future husband in the process, it'll probably be when I'm not even looking—because I'll be busy having a blast.

This Woman Had a Major Bathroom Mishap on a Date...and Dealt With It in the Most Hilarious Way Possible

Many of us have had the experience of encountering some, er, plumbing problems when using someone else's bathroom. But the courageous way one Toronto woman named Makela handled that situation is truly unique—some might even say innovative.
Here's the deal: Makela had to poop after she went back to a first date's place, she recounted on Twitter. The problem was, the toilet wasn't flushing. And she realized this a bit too late. Warning: This is when it gets really graphic."There was only one single piece of poop," she recalled. "So in that moment, something came over me. And I knew exactly what I had to do. I got toilet paper and removed the one poop from the toilet."But then she realized this plan may not have been so genius after all—because she didn't have anything to do with the No. 2 she'd just extracted (told you this was graphic). She'd already come too far, though. So, she said, "I did the only thing I could do. I wrapped it in multiple layers of toilet paper, and put it in my purse."Then, she returned to his couch as if nothing was wrong. Completely oblivious to what had just gone down in his bathroom, he kissed her and told her she was beautiful.

She started to see a light at the end of the tunnel when she heard him go to the bathroom and flush. Since it seemed like the toilet was working again, she went back in and flushed the poop from her purse—success!"By the grace of God, it worked. The poo was flushed. I was in the clear. Everything was going to be OK," she wrote. If that's not perseverance, we don't know what is.While the story is kind of embarrassing (even though so many women have been there), Makela seems to be taking it in stride on Twitter: "Wow. All of the hard work I put into being a hot girl is tarnished by one teeny tiny poop story. Now I'm just the poop girl."Now, let's just hope her date doesn't come across her Twitter feed...By the way, should you ever encounter this situation yourself, before resorting to hiding feces in your Fendi, try these two tips for getting a non-flushing toilet to flush: 1.Open the lid to the toilet. Is there water in the tank? If not, see if you can find a way to add some (you'll need about a gallon, usually—filling a small wastebasket from the sink could work). If there is water, or you've managed to add some, locate the rubber flapper at the bottom of the tank. Usually it has a chain connecting it to a metal lever, which connects to the handle, but if that's broken you can release the water into the bowl to flush by lifting up the flapper and holding it open. (If you think it's gross to reach into a toilet tank, rest assured, it's much more sanitary than putting poo in your purse.) 2.If there's something wrong with the tank, or it's a toilet without a visible tank (like in most public restrooms), you can flush the toilet by pouring a gallon of water directly into the bowl. You'll need to do it rather quickly (but start slow so you don't splash!) and then gravity will take over and "flush" the toilet.

Staring at People Might Make Them Seem More Attractive, Study Says

If you're not feeling it with a date initially, can that person grow on you? A new study suggests they might—if you're paying attention. The research, published in Psychological Science, indicates that how attractive we find someone is influence by how much attention we give to their faces.
In order to determine the role of our attention in how we perceive others, Harvard researchers had men and women rank two faces that showed up side-by-side on a screen. Before the faces were actually shown, there was a black dot on one side of the screen or the other, between where the face's eyes would appear, to draw participants' eyes to one face. Sure enough, faces were perceived as more attractive when they were on the same side as the dot.Researchers say this suggests that simply paying more attention to someone's face can alter a person's attractiveness—at least, when it comes to initial impressions. They also point out that their findings go to show that basic attractive features (or a lack thereof) aren't everything when it comes to how physically attractive we think someone actually is.

5 Ways to Meet Dates (That Don't Involve Your Computer or an App)

Dating sites and apps have become so popular that we all know someone who has found love online. But for many people looking to date, sifting through endless profiles and spending evenings swiping left to right can get super tiring.
I recently heard a woman lament, "Remember the days when we just met people out in public? Did that really happen?" I'm here to tell you that, yes, it did and does still happen! There are plenty of single people to meet if you want to take a digital break.Here are five ways to meet new people offline:1. Pick Up Single WomenIt may seem counter-intuitive to direct you to women while you're trying to find a new S.O.; but expanding your social network is a great first step in the pursuit of finding new great people.The next time you're at an event and feel bummed out that there aren't any available people, switch your focus to all of the amazing women in the room. By doing this, you're more likely to meet new people that will make your social life more interesting, and you're more likely to meet new good guys through their social network.2. Enlist Your Married FriendsYour married friends love to help you in the quest to meet great people to date since they've heard a number of your dating horror stories. Tell your friends some of your "must haves" and "can't stands" and see if they know anyone you haven't met yet that may have potential.The reality is that a guy who is singled out among a group of his married friends is more likely to be ready for a relationship than a man who spends all of his weekends out on the town with other single dudes. 3. Attend Events and Bars SoloImagine how intimidating it is for most guys to approach a group of women clustered together at an event. Unless he's skilled in a smooth pick-up game, this scenario is nerve-wracking for most.For this reason, consider attending an event or bar solo or stepping away from your group of friends so you're more likely to be approached.And, if you want to stand out in the room, take the advice of Ben Parr, the author of Captivology: The Science of Attracting Attention: "The science is clear: brighter, warmer colors attract our gaze, especially in dark rooms and at night. This is especially true for red. Multiple studies have found that wearing red makes you more attractive to the opposite sex." 4. Consider Where Your Type May Hang OutImagine the kind of person you want to meet. Is he bookish? Athletic? Super social? Obviously someone who is bookish and shy may not be hanging out and partying at your local bar.Going to new places to meet new people is a great idea not only because the kind of person you want to meet may be hanging out there, but because you're mixing up your routine. It's amazing how many of us hang out at the same spots and wonder why we're not meeting anyone new.5. Consider Where You'll Have Fun, RegardlessDon't go anywhere where you'll be miserable if you don't meet a guy. (Obvious newsflash: looking bored or annoyed isn't the best way to meet new people.)The goal is to get outside your comfort zone, but to still be in a zone where you can enjoy yourself whether or not you make a romantic connection.Enjoying your life and focusing on not meeting new dates is ironically one of the great ways to meet new people. The reason is simple: Most of us are attracted to people who seem secure and content, regardless of their relationship status.I don't believe there's one approach to finding love since dating online and meeting in the "real world" can both garner great results. But, if you're feeling online dating fatigue (it's a real condition!), it may be worth reminding yourself that there are numerous ways to meet new people that don't involve any of your screens.

Ghosting Is Way More Common Than You Think. So What Should You Do If It Happens to You?

Despite rumors to the contrary, Charlize Theron is adamant that she never "ghosted" Sean Penn after they split last year.
"There is this need to sensationalize things," she tells WSJ magazine in a new interview. "And the f--king ghosting thing, like literally, I still don't even know what it is." In case you're like Charlize, ghosting is when the person you're dating suddenly disappears—they stop responding to calls and texts without any explanation of why. Just like that, your relationship is over. And, according to a new survey, it's much more common than you think.This information comes courtesy of the dating site Plenty of Fish, which polled 800 of their daters between the ages of 18 and 33. According to the findings, a whopping 80 percent of them have been ghosted. Granted, it's a little easier to ghost someone in online dating where you typically don't share the same circle of friends, but that's a lot of people who are suddenly cut off with zero explanation.What's going on here? "Ghosting is becoming more common because it is so easy to do," says licensed clinical psychologist Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D., author of Should I Stay or Should I Go?. "Social media and tech make it easy to be sloppy in relationships, and ghosting is just one more form of this. Why face down a conversation when you can just disappear?"Not only does it just plain suck to be ghosted, it leaves people with no sense of closure or idea of why things didn't work out. But Durvasula points out that ghosting is often the fault of the ghoster, not the ghosted. "Ghosting usually reflects immaturity and psychological fragility on the part of the ghoster," she says.While it makes sense that you would want an explanation or even confirmation that things are over, Durvasula says there's little benefit to trying to get an answer. "If you are sure that this isn't a true missing persons issue that needs to be reported to law enforcement, then your next step is to ghost them from your heart and mind," she says. Why? A person who is a ghoster doesn't tend to be particularly accountable for their emotions and actions, she says, so repeatedly reaching out and asking for an explanation generally doesn't achieve much.So, if you're ghosted, the best thing you can do is just delete the person you used to date from your contacts and know that you're better off without them. "Ghosting is a coward's move," Durvasula says. "Once it's done to you, give yourself time to grieve...and then move forward."